There was a guy and he went to the doctor and he showed the doctor his dick.
He asked why it was orange and the doctor replyed:
Have you been doing anything unusual?
And he said: No.
So the doctor ran so tests then he sent the guy home told him to come back in 2 weeks.
So he did and it was even oranger so once again the doctor asked:
Have you been doing anything at all unusual?
And the guy said:
Well about 2 weeks ago I was watching porno and eating a bag of crunchy cheetos.
Yo mama's so technologically unsavvy, she leaves out pieces of cheese next to the computer!
Vote:
What did the mother vampire say to her daughter when she picked up a tampon?
"Honey, no in-between meal snacks!"
Vote:
Yo' Mama's breath is so nasty, it makes onions cry.
Chuck Norris does not eat.
Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.
Vote:
Your Momma is like Burger King "Have it Your Way".
Why couldnt the teddy bear eat any more thanksgiving dinner?
He was already stuffed!
Vote:
Why didn't the cannibal eat Mike Tyson?
He thought he would give him a paunch!
Vote:
"Hey Jaeger, are you enjoying that apple?"
"Sure, why do you ask."
"I was going to offer you some toast."
"How kind of... I'll accept."
"Great, but what's toast without any butter Jaeger."
"You're right about that!"
"Well give me a few seconds, let me go scrape some off of your mother's teeth!"
Vote:
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world.
Watch while I prove it to you.”
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you want, son?”
The boy takes the quarters and leaves. “What did I tell you?” said the barber.
“That kid never learns!” Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store.
“Hey, son! May I ask you a question?
Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?”
The boy licked his cone and replied, “Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!”