Yo' Mama is so stupid, it took her an hour to cook instant rice.
Q: What is the difference between a pizza and a women?
A: The pizza can be eaten but the women can't!
Why couldnt the teddy bear eat any more thanksgiving dinner?
He was already stuffed!
Vote:
"Hey Jaeger, are you enjoying that apple?"
"Sure, why do you ask."
"I was going to offer you some toast."
"How kind of... I'll accept."
"Great, but what's toast without any butter Jaeger."
"You're right about that!"
"Well give me a few seconds, let me go scrape some off of your mother's teeth!"
Vote:
Men are like.....Popcorn.
They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
Q. A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces.
A. "Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."
Why would the cannibal only eat babies?
He was on a diet!
Vote:
Q: What is the difference between anal sex and a microwave
A: A microwave doesn't brown your meat.
What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection?
A quarter pounder with cheese
A ham sandwich walked into a bar and the bartender said: "We don't sell to ham sandwiches."
But the sandwich replied: "That's okay, I only want a beer."