Why did the blonde snort sweet n' low?
She thought it was diet coke.
Q: What side of the cow gives the most milk?
A: The utter side.
A blonde walks into a library and says, "Can I have a burger and fries?"
The librarian says, "I'm sorry, this is a library."
So the blonde whispers, "Oh sorry! can I have a diet coke then?"
There was three Mexicans walking down the street when three old white guys approached them. The first white man said:
Whats up wet backs.
The first mexican said:
I am not wet, I am just greasy from stealing car parts.
The second old man said:
What the hells that smell, smells like beanery.
The second Mexican replies:
It don't smell like beanery, we just got back from taco bell.
The third mexican says:
YaYA, amigo, we just got back from Taco Bell.
The third white guys says:
I was talking to the bean, not the whole damn burrito.
Q: What is a man's idea of a balanced diet?
A: A Budweiser in each hand!
Bears do not eat bears.
Tigers do not eat tigers.
Dogs do not eat dogs.
Cats stopped eating kebabs.
I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas.
The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the beat of the music.
After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everybody was staring at me...
Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.
Did you hear about the blonde who took an hour to cook Minute Rice?