What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't because it won't come.
Q. Why don't blondes eat Jello? A. They can't figure out how to get two cups of water into those little packages.
Two old ladies are in a restaurant. One complains, "You know, the food here is just terrible." The other shakes her head and adds, "And such small portions."
What is the difference between turkey and mother-in-law? There is no difference: both are the best when they are cold on the table.
Q: What's the difference between jelly and jam? A: I can't jelly my dick a baby's throat.
Teacher: Now, Ramu, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating? Ramu: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
Johnny collected lots of money from trick or treating and he went to the candy store to buy some chocolate. "You should give that money to charity", said the shopkeeper. "No, I'll buy the chocolate. YOU give the money to charity!"
Why did the blonde snort sweet n' low? She thought it was diet coke.
An Asian walks into a McDonald's and says, "I'll Have An Eggroll and Some Fry Rye." "I'm sorry sir we don't serve that. Would you like anything else?" "I have quarter pounder. And when would you like to pick that up...Hiroshima!"
Q: What side of the cow gives the most milk? A: The utter side.