The best friendship jokes

Q. How are fat girls and mopeds alike? A. They are fun to ride but you don't want your friends to find out.
Vote: has 72.56 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, friendship, women
Get bad marks, relatives will insult you. Get good marks, friends will insult you.
Vote: has 71.85 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: family, friendship, insulting, school
One day, a space ship landed in a farmer’s field and a Martian man and his wife got out and introduced themselves to the farmer and his wife. As a token of his friendship, the farmer immediately invited the Martian couple in his home and begged them to stay for the evening and have dinner, so the Martians agreed. Later that night, the Martian man explained how, on their planet, it was customary to swap partners as a token of friendship. The farmer, not wanting to offend his alien neighbors, readily agreed. The Martian then man took the farmer’s wife into one bedroom while the farmer took the Martian woman into another. They had been having sex for about an hour when the Martian man asked the farmer’s wife, “Well, how do you like having sex with a Martian? How does it feel?” The farmer’s wife replied “It needs to be a little bigger around.” So the Martian man twisted his right ear and presto, his penis became bigger around. About an hour later, the Martian man asked the farmer’s wife again “How does it feel now?” The farmer’s wife responded “I think it needs to be a little longer.” So the Martian man twisted his left ear and presto, his penis became longer. The next morning, after their alien neighbors had left, the farmer and his wife were having coffee at the breakfast table and the farmer asked his wife “How was the Martian man?” To this, the farmer’s wife replied “Fine.” “And how about the Martian woman?” The farmer replied, “That damn bitch yanked on my fucking ears all night long!”
Vote: has 71.72 % from 46 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: couple, dirty, friendship, sex, wife
Two friends, Jenny and Jinny were thinking what to play during the afternoon. For a long time, they could not decide upon any game. Suddenly, Jenny had an idea. She turned to Jinny and said excitedly. "Let's play schools". "OK!" said Jinny. "But I'm going to be absent."
Vote: has 71.43 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: friendship, game, mean, school, time
Bro, send me some good jokes. Sorry, now I'm busy with my Girlfriend. Good One! Send me more.
Vote: has 70.01 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: friendship, insulting, love, relationship, time
*How girls become friends* Omg I love your shoes! *How guys become friends* Excuse me sir, I see you fuck bitches, I myself, also fuck bitches.
Vote: has 69.77 % from 262 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, friendship
Your mama so old she was friends with Cleopatra.
Vote: has 66.10 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, friendship, Yo mama
Two friends talk: "Hi, what are you doing?" "Not much, writing a Valentine's Day greeting card." "Why are you writing it with your left hand? Are you left-handed?" "No, I just can't let my right hand to see it. It's a surprise for it."
Vote: has 64.34 % from 39 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, friendship, Valentines day
So I heard the reason Usain Bolt is so fast is because his offseason training consists of going back home and hitting on dudes.
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: athlete, friendship, sport
You don't think "The Simpsons" is all that funny, but you watch it because that Flanders fellow makes a lot of sense.
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: friendship, republican