Chuck Norris can access the DB from the UI.
New Year's Resolutions for Internet Junkies... I will try to figure out why I *really* need 9 e-mail addresses. I will stop sending e-mail to my wife (husband). I resolve to work with neglected children -- my own. I will answer my snail mail with the same enthusiasm with which I answer my e-mail. I will stop sending e-mail, ICQ, Instant Messages and be on the phone at the same time with the same person. I resolve to back up my 12GB hard drive daily...well, once a week... okay, monthly then...or maybe... I will spend less than one hour a day on the Internet. This, of course, will be hard to estimate since I'm not a clock watcher. When I hear "Where do you want to go today?" I will not reply "MS Tech Support." When I hear a funny joke I will not reply, "LOL... LOL!" I will read the manual... just as soon as I can find it. I will think of a password other than "password." I will stop checking my e-mail at 3:00 in the morning... 4:30 is much more practical. I resolve... I resolve to... I resolve to, uh... I resolve to, uh, get my, er... I resolve to, uh, get my, er, off-line work done, too!
Q: Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas? A: Because Oct 31 == Dec 25!
Chuck Norris's programs can pass the Turing Test by staring at the interrogator.
Chuck Norris doesn't use GUI, he prefers the command line.
Q: Why can't lawyers do NMR? A: Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
Chuck Norris can access private methods.
Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
Chuck Norris knows the value of NULL, and he can sort by it too.
What would a computer geek is going to do after seeing a beautiful woman? "Immediately start downloading it."