The best graduation jokes

After twelve years of carrying books to school, you're well prepared for a career in backpacking.
Vote: has 69.96 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: graduation, school, time, work
I remember my guidance counselor. The guy studied for years for his job, and deepest thing he ever said to me was, "You have your whole life ahead of you."
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: graduation, memory, student, time, work
It's graduation day, and everybody's going to get their diploma but Josh. At the assembly, the entire senior class stands up and shouts "Let Josh graduate, let Josh graduate!" The principal agrees to give Josh one last chance. "If I have five apples in my right hand and five in my left hand, Josh, how many apples do I have?" he asked. Josh thought long and hard and then said: "Ten." And the entire senior class stood up and shouted, "Give Josh another chance. Give Josh another chance!"
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: graduation, school, student
I'll be honest. I did not graduate at the top of my class. In fact, I was so close to the bottom, my sheepskin had a tail.
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: graduation, school, student
It was graduation day and Mom was trying to take a picture of their son in a cap and gown, posed with his father. "Let’s try to make this look natural" she said. "Junior, put your arm around your dad’s shoulder." The father answered, "If you want it to look natural, why not have him put his hand in my pocket?"
Vote: has 56.84 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dad, graduation, kids
Chuck Norris graduated college in one hour.
Vote: has 50.70 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, college, graduation, time