The best Halloween jokes

I'm going trick or treating with my mum tonight. It's the only time I can take her out as she's been dead for ten years.
Vote: has 64.76 % from 29 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, death, family, Halloween, time
Yo momma’s so ugly, the Government moved Halloween to her birthday.
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: birthday, Halloween, ugly, Yo mama
Darth Vader wears a Chuck Norris mask for Halloween.
Vote: has 63.00 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, Halloween
A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Halloween, health, kids
Did you hear about the wild party at the haunted house? The whole vibe was anything ghost.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Halloween, party
Q: Why couldn't the witch have children? A: Her husband had a hallow weenie.
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Halloween, husband, kids
Michael: "What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween?" Matthew: "I don't know. What?" Michael: "Candy corneas."
Vote: has 52.49 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, disgusting, doctor, Halloween, morbid
Q: Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas? A: Because Oct 31 == Dec 25!
Vote: has 51.86 % from 35 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Christmas, geek, Halloween, IT, programmer
Chuck Norris was supposed to be in the movie Halloween but the director thought it would be kind of stupid for Michael Meyers to stab himself in fear.
Vote: has 48.78 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Halloween, stupid
I'm going to celebrate Halloween the same way I always do... by murdering a bunch of teens by the lake. Sincerely, Michael Myers
Vote: has 46.37 % from 33 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, death, Halloween, teen