The best Halloween jokes

Q: How do you know your doctor is a vampire? A: He draws your blood from your neck with a straw!
has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: doctor, Halloween
Michael: "What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween?" Matthew: "I don't know. What?" Michael: "Candy corneas."
has 57.40 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: black humor, disgusting, doctor, Halloween, morbid
Yo momma’s so ugly, the Government moved Halloween to her birthday.
has 52.38 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: birthday, Halloween, ugly, Yo mama
Q: Why couldn't the witch have children? A: Her husband had a hallow weenie.
has 49.79 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: Halloween, husband, kids
Q: Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas? A: Because Oct 31 == Dec 25!
has 49.74 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, geek, Halloween, IT, programmer
On Halloween, children give Chuck Norris candy.
has 47.72 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Halloween
Yo mama so ugly that she doesn't need a costume for Halloween.
has 47.21 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: Halloween, insulting, ugly, Yo mama
I'm going to celebrate Halloween the same way I always do... by murdering a bunch of teens by the lake. Sincerely, Michael Myers
has 45.68 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, Halloween, teen
Did you hear about the wild party at the haunted house? The whole vibe was anything ghost.
has 44.13 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: Halloween, party
Darth Vader wears a Chuck Norris mask for Halloween.
has 39.18 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, Halloween
More jokes →
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