The best Halloween jokes

On Halloween, children give Chuck Norris candy.
Vote: has 64.28 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Halloween
Darth Vader wears a Chuck Norris mask for Halloween.
Vote: has 63.00 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, Halloween
Yo momma’s so ugly, the Government moved Halloween to her birthday.
Vote: has 62.22 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: birthday, Halloween, ugly, Yo mama
Did you hear about the wild party at the haunted house? The whole vibe was anything ghost.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Halloween, party
Q: Why couldn't the witch have children? A: Her husband had a hallow weenie.
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Halloween, husband, kids
Michael: "What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween?" Matthew: "I don't know. What?" Michael: "Candy corneas."
Vote: has 54.97 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, disgusting, doctor, Halloween, morbid
A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
Vote: has 54.26 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Halloween, health, kids
Chuck Norris was supposed to be in the movie Halloween but the director thought it would be kind of stupid for Michael Meyers to stab himself in fear.
Vote: has 49.61 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Halloween, stupid
I'm going to celebrate Halloween the same way I always do... by murdering a bunch of teens by the lake. Sincerely, Michael Myers
Vote: has 48.37 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, death, Halloween, teen
Q: Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas? A: Because Oct 31 == Dec 25!
Vote: has 48.02 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Christmas, geek, Halloween, IT, programmer