The best health jokes

Yo' Mama is so stanky, she gets sourdough yeast infections.
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has 50.45 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: health, insulting, Yo mama
An alcoholic addict just returned home from a rehab and he saw crate of empty bottles sitting at the corner and he goes there grab one and smacknit to the wall and said "you made my wife leave me." Grab another one and smashes it and said "you made me get fired from work" and grab another one which was full and was about to smash it and he brushes it and said "you were not part of them and open and drink...."
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has 49.93 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, health, life, wife, work
My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments.
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has 48.79 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: dentist, food, health
Yo mama's so stupid she studied for blood test and failed.
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has 48.79 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: health, student, stupid, Yo mama
AIDS Can't Kill Chuck Norris.
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has 48.78 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, health
Three old men were sitting on a porch. "I wish I could take a healthy piss," said one. "I wish I could take a healthy crap," said another. "I can take a crap at 6 AM and a piss at 11 AM. I just wish I could get up before noon."
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has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, health, time
Deciding to take up jogging, the middle-aged man was astounded by the wide selection of jogging shoes available at the local sports shoe store. While trying on a basic pair of jogging shoe, he noticed a minor feature and asked the clerk about it. “What’s this little pocket thing here on the side for?” “Oh, that’s to carry spare change so you can call your wife to come pick you up when you’ve jogged too far.”
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has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: age, health, money, old people, wife
Doctor: "I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live." Patient: "What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!" Doctor: "Nine."
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has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: doctor, health, life, time
What happens when you kiss a canary? You get chirpes, it can't be tweeted because its a canarial disease.
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has 47.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, health, parrot
Teacher: "If you bought 8 hotdogs,9 cheese burgers and 7 fillet o fishes and you ate 8 hotdogs 9 cheese burger and 7 fillet o fish what do you have at the end?" Little Johnny: "A bad blatter issue."
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has 46.60 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: fish, food, health, little Johnny, math
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