Obama's health care plan won't cover injuries caused by a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to the face. Nobody would survive anyway.
Bruce Lee didn't die from an allergic reaction. He died cause Chuck Norris decided to not let him live anymore.
What’s the sex? The sex in a disease. You always get in bed because of it.
What do you call a van with 5 faggots in it? The AIDS team.
Chuck Norris's tears can cure every type of cancer, the only problem is he never cried.
Chuck Norris once round house kicked a fat kid in the stomach and his foot print stayed their until the kid lost the weight.
Chuck Norris doesn't need health care, everyone in his viewing range does.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Professor X is on a wheelchair.
Q: Why was the black baby crying? A: He had diarea and thought he was melting.
So this retarded blind couple just lives in Guantanamo Bay. The prison warden told us soon these little fishies would grow gills. So we have been feeding our fishies since 911 they all been fed really well. In our daily water events until I told my wife, "there is a problem these fish haven't grown any gills." So we told the Warden and he laughed he said: "you know what you've been doing since 911 the blind couple relied on what!" The warden replied, "well you've been waterboarding convicted isis terrorists!" The blind couple said, "what happens to the fishes?" The warden replied, "well they are dead of course!"