The best health jokes

Chuck Norris once caught AIDS... but then he let it go.
Vote: has 78.23 % from 78 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, health
Birthdays are good for your health. Studies have shown that people who have more birthdays live longer.
Vote: has 78.15 % from 31 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, birthday, health, life
"Doctor, please, my son ate some cement. What can I do?" "First of all, don't give him anything to drink."
Vote: has 78.15 % from 31 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, doctor, health, kids
Teacher (on phone): "You say Michael has a cold and can't come to school today? To whom am I speaking?" Voice: "This is my father."
Vote: has 77.20 % from 47 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dad, health, kids, teacher
An old man goes to his doctor. The doctor says "I got some bad news for you. you have Cancer and you have Alzheimer's." And the old man says "At least I don't have Cancer."
Vote: has 76.96 % from 52 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: doctor, health, old people
How do you know Charles Sweeney was dyslexic? He wanted to order the flaming saganagi, but he accidentally ordered a flaming Nagasaki.
Vote: has 76.32 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, celebrity, geography, health, war
Doctor: "You look much worse than you did last week! I said you should smoke a maximum of five cigarettes a day!" Patient: "And that's what I did. And it wasn't easy because up until now I didn't smoke at all!"
Vote: has 76.27 % from 34 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, doctor, health, stupid
Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: Getting her out of the wheelchair.
Vote: has 76.27 % from 45 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, food, health
The Teacher asked Little Johnny, "How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?" Little Johnny replied, "Just Don't bite any."
Vote: has 76.10 % from 256 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, health, little Johnny, teacher
Q: What's worse than having termites in your piano? A: Crabs on your organ.
Vote: has 76.06 % from 28 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, health


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