The best health jokes

Laughing is always good except when you have diarrhea.
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has 72.33 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, health
Chuck Norris once caught AIDS... but then he let it go.
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has 72.02 % from 122 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, health
Q: What's worse than having termites in your piano? A: Crabs on your organ.
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has 71.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: animal, health
Knock-knock Who is there? A shattered penis with many diseases. What kind of illness? Gall, Aids, Gonorrhea, Syphilis... Enough, it is the best present for my mother in law.
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has 70.79 % from 495 votes. More jokes about: black humor, health, knock-knock, mother in law, vulgar
The City Health inspector walks into a new restaurant unannounced and takes a seat where he can see the kitchen. While he is sitting there, an order goes back for a pizza. The chef appears and the health inspector nearly chokes when he sees that he is not wearing a shirt. As if the health inspector didn't already have enough fuel for his citation-writing pen, the chef proceeded to grab a lump of pizza dough and press it out flat on his bare chest. Appalled, the health inspector had barely finished up when an order came back for a hamburger. The cook proceeded to grab a handful of ground meat and pressed it into a perfect patty in his armpit. Shocked an bewildered, the health inspector called for the manager and explained the gravity of the deplorable conditions he had seen. "That's nothing," replied the manager, "You should come back at five in the morning when he makes the donuts!"
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has 70.40 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: food, health, life
Did you hear about the Easter egg hunt for the Alzheimer's patients? They hid their own eggs!
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has 70.06 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: black humor, easter, food, health
You are in my heart, you are in my blood, you are in all my body. Alas, my doc says: "You are a parasite!"
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has 70.05 % from 151 votes. More jokes about: doctor, flirt, health, mean, romantic
What is the worst combination of illnesses? Alzheimer's and diarrhea. You're running, but can't remember where.
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has 69.93 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: health
Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly. One student said to his friend: "I'm sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that." The other student says: "No, I don't think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki Syndrome. He walks slowly and his legs are apart, just as we learned in class." Since they couldn't agree they decided to ask the old man. They approached him and one of the students said to him, "We're medical students and couldn't help but notice the way you walk, but we couldn't agree on the syndrome you might have. Could you tell us what it is?" The old man said, "I'll tell you, but first you tell me what you two fine medical students think." The first student said, "I think it's Peltry Syndrome." The old man said, "You thought - but you are wrong." The other student said, "I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome." The old man said, "You thought - but you are wrong." So they asked him, "Well, old timer, what do you have?" The old man said, "I thought it was gas - but I was wrong, too!"
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has 69.88 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: age, health, medical, old people, student
Two dyslectic fellas sat in the kitchen... Fella 1: "Ere, can you smell gas?" Fella 2: "Who me? No... I can't even smell my own name!"
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has 69.86 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: communication, friendship, health, stupid
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