The best health jokes

Two cows were talking in the field. One cow says, "Have you heard about the Mad Cow disease that's going around?" The other cow answers, "Yeah, makes you glad you're a penguin, doesn"t it?"
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has 73.48 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: animal, health
A few guys tried to follow Chuck Norris during a light workout while he was vacationing in Hawaii. It's now called the Ironman Triathlon.
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has 72.97 % from 164 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, geography, gym, health
One of the benefits of eating healthier is that you never have to ask questions like, "Who ate my kale?"
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has 72.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: communication, food, health
Two dyslectic fellas sat in the kitchen... Fella 1: "Ere, can you smell gas?" Fella 2: "Who me? No... I can't even smell my own name!"
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has 72.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: communication, friendship, health, stupid
How can you tell if you have acne? If the blind can read your face.
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has 72.33 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: black humor, health
Q: What is the first symptom of AIDS? A: A sharp pain in the ass.
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has 72.22 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: health, medical, sex
Laughing is always good except when you have diarrhea.
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has 71.86 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, health
Q: What's worse than having termites in your piano? A: Crabs on your organ.
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has 71.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: animal, health
Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly. One student said to his friend: "I'm sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that." The other student says: "No, I don't think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki Syndrome. He walks slowly and his legs are apart, just as we learned in class." Since they couldn't agree they decided to ask the old man. They approached him and one of the students said to him, "We're medical students and couldn't help but notice the way you walk, but we couldn't agree on the syndrome you might have. Could you tell us what it is?" The old man said, "I'll tell you, but first you tell me what you two fine medical students think." The first student said, "I think it's Peltry Syndrome." The old man said, "You thought - but you are wrong." The other student said, "I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome." The old man said, "You thought - but you are wrong." So they asked him, "Well, old timer, what do you have?" The old man said, "I thought it was gas - but I was wrong, too!"
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has 71.00 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: age, health, medical, old people, student
Knock-knock Who is there? A shattered penis with many diseases. What kind of illness? Gall, Aids, Gonorrhea, Syphilis... Enough, it is the best present for my mother in law.
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has 70.99 % from 546 votes. More jokes about: black humor, health, knock-knock, mother in law, vulgar
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