The best health jokes

Why did the computer get cold? Because it forgot to close windows.
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has 71.15 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: computer, health, IT
One of the benefits of eating healthier is that you never have to ask questions like, "Who ate my kale?"
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has 70.84 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: communication, food, health
My late grandfather always told me: "When there is a wind in your belly blow it out gently you feel a real comfort then look at the other's faces to see what are their reactions."
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has 70.39 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: family, fart, health
Knock-knock Who is there? A shattered penis with many diseases. What kind of illness? Gall, Aids, Gonorrhea, Syphilis... Enough, it is the best present for my mother in law.
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has 70.24 % from 317 votes. More jokes about: black humor, health, knock-knock, mother in law, vulgar
Q: What sickness do cowboys get from riding wild horses? A: Bronchitis.
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has 69.55 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: cowboy, health, horse, medical
Q: What's worse than having termites in your piano? A: Crabs on your organ.
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has 69.39 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal, health
If you are ill, so lie down and you'll walk it sooner loose.
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has 69.28 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: health
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: "Well, I hope you like changing nappies/diapers". She replies: "Oh my god am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?" To which he responds: "No, you've got bowel cancer."
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has 68.72 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: black humor, doctor, health
Your momma is so ugly when she gets her beauty sleep she falls into a coma!
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has 68.72 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: beauty, health, insulting, ugly, Yo mama
A man returns to the U.S. from Africa feeling very ill. He goes to see his doctor, and is immediately rushed to the hospital, to undergo a barrage of extensive tests. The man wakes up after the tests in a private room at the hospital, and the phone by his bed rings. “This is your doctor. We’ve had the results back from your tests and we’ve found you have an extremely nasty virus, which is extremely contagious!” “Oh my gosh,” cries the man. He’s in a panic now. “What are you going to do, doctor?” “Well we’re going to put you on a diet of pizzas, pancakes, and pita bread.” “Will that cure me?” asked the man hopefully. The doctor replied, “Well no, but … it’s the only food we can get under the door.”
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has 68.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: black humor, doctor, food, health, hospital