The best health jokes

Patient: "Doctor, my son has swallowed a pen. What can I do?" Doctor: "Use a pencil till I come to see your son."
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has 66.50 % from 77 votes. More jokes about: black humor, doctor, health
Girl: "I can't be your valentine for medical reasons." Boy: "Really?" Girl: "Yeah, you make me sick!"
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has 66.46 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: health, medical, Valentines day
Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: Getting her out of the wheelchair.
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has 66.27 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: black humor, food, health
There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.
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has 66.17 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: flirt, health, romantic
A doctor told his patient that his test results indicated that she had a rare disease and had only six months to live. "That's such a short amount of time, doctor. Isn't there anything I can do?" pleaded the patient. "Marry a lawyer," the doctor advised. "It will be the longest six months of your life."
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has 66.15 % from 93 votes. More jokes about: doctor, health, lawyer, marriage, time
Did you hear about the male prostitute who got leprosy? He did okay until his business fell off.
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has 65.80 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: black humor, business, health
Q: What is the difference between an oral and rectal thermometer? A: The taste
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has 65.16 % from 116 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, health
Patient goes to Doctor, doctor starts looking at him... - Good, good, good... - Doctor, what's good? - Good that I don't have what you have...
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has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: doctor, health, life
Q: What sickness do cowboys get from riding wild horses? A: Bronchitis.
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has 64.52 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: cowboy, health, horse, medical
If you are ill, so lie down and you'll walk it sooner loose.
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has 64.28 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: health