Q: What is brown, small, and smells of caramel? A: A diabetic who's been struck by lightning.
Did you hear about the male prostitute who got leprosy? He did okay until his business fell off.
If you are ill, so lie down and you'll walk it sooner loose.
Girl: "I can't be your valentine for medical reasons." Boy: "Really?" Girl: "Yeah, you make me sick!"
Q: What's brown and very bad for your dental health? A: A baseball bat.
The doctor stood by the bedside of a very sick patient and said, “I cannot hide the fact that your are very ill, my man. Is there any one you would like to see?”. “Yes,” replied the patient faintly, “Another doctor”.
Chuck Norris' pulse-rate is measured on the Richter Scale.
Doctor: "Sir, I have some bad news; you have been diagnosed with cancer and Alzheimers." Old man: "Well, at least I don't have cancer!"
Patient goes to Doctor, doctor starts looking at him... - Good, good, good... - Doctor, what's good? - Good that I don't have what you have...
Doctor (to the patient: "Did I not give you the medicine yesterday? Did you take it?" Patient: "Yes, sir. But I did not drink it." Doctor: "Why?" Patient (Pointing to the bottle): "Because it is written on the label: 'Close the cork tightly and keep it in a cool place.'"