Did you hear about the male prostitute who got leprosy? He did okay until his business fell off.
If you are ill, so lie down and you'll walk it sooner loose.
There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.
Q: What's brown and very bad for your dental health? A: A baseball bat.
The doctor stood by the bedside of a very sick patient and said, “I cannot hide the fact that your are very ill, my man. Is there any one you would like to see?”. “Yes,” replied the patient faintly, “Another doctor”.
Chuck Norris' pulse-rate is measured on the Richter Scale.
A man went with his wife on honeymoon and they were getting undressed together for the first time. The man took off his shoes and socks and his toes were all twisted and discolored. "What happened to your feet?" his wife asked. "I had a childhood disease called Tolio." "Don't you mean polio?" "No, tolio, it only affects the toes." Men then removed his pants and revealed an awful-looking pair of knees. "What happened to your knees?" she asked. "Well, I also had Kneesles." "Don't you mean measles?" "No, kneesles, it only affects the knees." When he removed his shorts, his wife gasped and said, "Don't tell me, you also had Smallcox!"
Yo mama so fat when Dracula bit her he said "1 diabete, 2 diabete, 3 diabete".
The Total Gym uses Chuck Norris to stay in shape.
Doctor: "Sir, I have some bad news; you have been diagnosed with cancer and Alzheimers." Old man: "Well, at least I don't have cancer!"