Little lad is sitting between his Mum and Dad on the sofa and they are playing a game about what sounds animals say. His Mum says "What does a duck say Tommy?" He says"Quack quack Mummy." His Mum says "Very good Tommy,that's right." She says "What does a dog say?" He says "Woof woof Mummy." She says "Very good." She says "What does a cat say?" He says "Meow meow Mummy." She says "Yes that's right." Tommy says "Let Daddy have a go." His dad says "Ok Tommy,what does a cow say?" The little lad looks confused and his Dad says "Come on Tommy you know what a cow says." Tommy says "Yes I do but do you mean a cow that eats grass and gives us our milk, or the one you where talking to Uncle John about, that said you could'nt go to the Stag show with him?"
"You're single and I'm single too! You know what that means?" "What" "We're both ugly!"
Yo mama so ugly, people break into her house to close the curtains!
Yo mama is so fat, she needs two Facebook accounts for her profile picture.
"Madam, your son just called me an ugly swine!" The mother apologizes shamefacedly, "I'm so sorry, I must have told him like a thousand times it is wrong to judge people just from how they look..."
Asians are so bad at driving, I'm starting to think Pearl Harbor was an accident.
Yo momma so dumb she threw a ball at the ground and missed.
Yo mamma so fat she broke the stairway to heaven.
The main distinction between a boss and the Pope is the Pope only expects you to kiss his ring.
You are so old, you walked into an antique shop and they sold you.