There are only two kinds of computer.
The latest model, and the obsolete.
Whats the chemical formula of compressed liquid oxygen?
O2.zip
99 little bugs in the code,
99 bugs in the code,
1 bug fixed...
Compile again,
100 little bugs in the code.
A computer programmer happens across a frog in the road.
The frog pipes up, "I'm really a beautiful princess and if you kiss me, I'll stay with you for a week".
The programmer shrugs his shoulders and puts the frog in his pocket.
A few minutes later, the frog says "OK, OK, if you kiss me, I'll give you great sex for a week".
The programmer nods and puts the frog back in his pocket.
A few minutes later, "Turn me back into a princess and I'll give you great sex for a whole year!"
The programmer smiles and walks on.
Finally, the frog says, "What's wrong with you? I've promised you great sex for a year from a beautiful princess and you won't even kiss a frog?"
"I'm a programmer," he replies.
"I don't have time for sex.But a talking frog is pretty neat."
Vote:
Q: Which Bible character had no parents?
A: Joshua, son of Nun (Joshua 1:1).
If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.
The rest of them will write Perl programs.
"Have you got the address of the butter website?"
"Yes, but don't spread it around."
Vote:
Q: How did the elephant destroy the database?
A: His truncate it.
Yo mama's so fat when she made a YouTube account the entire network crashed.
I put so much more effort into naming my first Wi-Fi than my first child.