The best IT jokes

Yo mama's so fat when she made a YouTube account the entire network crashed.
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has 64.69 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: fat, insulting, IT, Yo mama
I needed to quickly run a SQL command to update a single row in an Oracle DB table at work. To my horror, it came back with –2,193,674 rows affected.
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has 64.52 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: IT
A computer programmer happens across a frog in the road. The frog pipes up, "I'm really a beautiful princess and if you kiss me, I'll stay with you for a week". The programmer shrugs his shoulders and puts the frog in his pocket. A few minutes later, the frog says "OK, OK, if you kiss me, I'll give you great sex for a week". The programmer nods and puts the frog back in his pocket. A few minutes later, "Turn me back into a princess and I'll give you great sex for a whole year!" The programmer smiles and walks on. Finally, the frog says, "What's wrong with you? I've promised you great sex for a year from a beautiful princess and you won't even kiss a frog?" "I'm a programmer," he replies. "I don't have time for sex.But a talking frog is pretty neat."
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has 64.34 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: animal, computer, IT, programmer
Q: What does a baby computer call its dad? A: Data
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has 64.28 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: baby, computer, dad, IT
Caller: Oh, no, it’s just the stupid, stupid design of this computer. Every time I want to click something, I have to unplug the keyboard to plug in the mouse. And then every time I want to use the keyboard again, I have to unplug the mouse. Because there’s only one jack. Agent: Ma’am, you do realize that there’s a jack on the keyboard itself? You’re supposed to plug the mouse into the keyboard, and the keyboard into the computer. Caller: Are you kidding me!? Oh, wait a minute—yes, I see it now! Oh, holy cow. That’s going to be so much easier! Agent: Just out of curiosity, how long have you been using your computer that way? Caller: Six weeks!
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has 64.21 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: computer, IT, stupid
There are 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary and those who have regular sex.
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has 64.09 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: IT, sex
Bill Gates dies and goes to God. God says to him: Because you invented the screen saver I give you the possibility to go wherever you want. God shoes Bill that in hell there are lots of naked chicks and beaches. So he chooses hell. After a while God returns and asks him if he like’s it there. Bill says: No! Where are all the chicks you just showed me? Oh that! That was just a screen saver.
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has 63.82 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: god, IT
Hide a seek champion... ; Since 1958
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has 63.82 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: coding, computer, geek, IT, nerd
To understand what recursion is, you must first understand recursion.
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has 63.81 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: computer, IT, programmer
A businessman is invited for an audience with the Pope but finds it clashes with a meeting he has with Bill Gates. The businessman asks his secretary which appointment he should go to. ‘Definitely the Pope,’ replies the secretary. ‘He’ll only expect you to kiss his hand.’
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has 63.75 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: IT
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