Joke #10020

Where do steers go to dance? To the Meat Ball.
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Did you find my horse well behaved? Indeed, whenever we came to a fence he let me over first!
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What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't because it won't come.
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Why do rabbits go to the beauty parlor? For hare care.
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Q: What did the emu say to the nurse? A: Mend her bones or walk the plank
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A guy walks into a bar and sees a dog lying in the corner licking his balls. He turns to the bartender and says, "Boy, I wish I could do that." The Bartender replies, "You'd better try petting him first."
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Q: Why do cops arrest black people? A: Because monkeys belong in cages.
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Did you hear about the snobby cow? She thought she was a cutlet above the rest.
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A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver looked at the child and blurted out, "That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" Infuriated, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus. The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong. "The bus driver insulted me," she fumed. The man sympathized and said, "Why, he shouldn't say things to insult passengers. He could be fired for that." "You're right," she said. "I think I'll go back up there and give him a piece of my mind!" "That's a good idea," the man said. "Here, let me hold your monkey."
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A woman saw an ad in the local newspaper which read: "Purebred Police Dog $25." Thinking that to be a great bargain, she called and ordered the dog to be delivered. The next day a van arrived at her home and delivered the mangiest-looking mongrel she had ever seen. In a rage, she telephoned the man who had placed the ad, "How dare you call that mangy-mutt a purebred police dog?" "Don't let his looks deceive you, ma'am," the man replied, "He's in the Secret Service."
Vote: has 69.73 % from 82 votes. Send joke:

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I hope to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.
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