Joke #9954

What is a moo hoo for steak that came late? Filet delay.
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

What do cows read at the breakfast table? The moospaper.
Vote: has 43.46 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food
What is a nigger? Proof that skunks fuck monkeys.
Vote: has 72.32 % from 287 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, black people
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep with a teddy bear. He sleeps with a real bear.
Vote: has 49.51 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
Animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.
Vote: has 34.78 % from 6 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
A lady is walking down the street to work and she sees a parrot in a pet store. The parrot says to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." Well, the lady is furious! And she storms past the store to her work. On the way home she saw the same parrot in the window and the parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." Well, she was incredibly ticked now. The next day see saw the same parrot and the parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." The lady was so ticked that she went into the store and said that she would sue the store and kill the bird. The store manager said, "That's not good." and promised he wouldn't say it again. When the lady walked past the store after work the parrot said to her, "Hey lady." She paused and said, "Yes?" and the bird said, "You know."
Vote: has 79.35 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
What do you get if you cross a teddy bear with a pig? (A teddy boar!)
Vote: has 14.23 % from 9 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
A nude guy was sunbathing at the beach, a little girl comes to him, he covers his private parts with a newspaper. The little girl asks, "hats under there?" So the man answers , "A bird..." The girl goes away & the man falls asleep. When he wakes up, he finds himself in a hospital & in alot of pain. A doctor comes up to his bed & asks, 'What happened?' The man answers, "I don't know. I was at the beach & fell asleep after talking to a little girl." So the doctor tells this to the Police, and they go to the beach to find any witnesses. When they got there, they see the little girl the man was talking about. So they ask her if she did anything to the man...? She answers, "I din't do anything to the man, but he was sleeping, I played with his bird, After a while, it spat at me, so i broke its neck, burnt its nest, and smashed all its eggs!"
Vote: has 61.71 % from 36 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, cop, doctor, men
Why did the frog cross the street? Because the chicken crossed the road.
Vote: has 16.16 % from 8 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Why did the dinosaur have so few friends? Because Tyrannosaurus reeks!
Vote: has 24.26 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "If I show you a really good trick, will you give me a free drink?" The bartender considers it, then agrees. The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny rat. He reaches into his other pocket and pulls out a tiny piano. The rat stretches, cracks his knuckles, and proceeds to play the blues. After the man finished his drink, he asked the bartender, "If I show you an even better trick, will you give me free drinks for the rest of the evening?" The bartender agrees, thinking that no trick could possibly be better than the first. The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny rat. He reaches into his other pocket and pulls out a tiny piano. The rat stretches, cracks his knuckles, and proceeds to play the blues. The man reaches into another pocket and pulls out a small bullfrog, who begins to sing along with the rat's music. While the man is enjoying his beverages, a stranger confronts him and offers him $100,000.00 for the bullfrog. "Sorry," the man replies, "he's not for sale." The stranger increases the offer to $250,000.00 cash up front. "No," he insists, "he's not for sale." The stranger again increases the offer, this time to $500,000.00 cash. The man finally agrees, and turns the frog over to the stranger in exchange for the money. "Are you insane?" the bartender demanded. "That frog could have been worth millions to you, and you let him go for a mere $500,000!" "Don't worry about it." the man answered. "The frog was really nothing special. You see, the rat's a ventriloquist."
Vote: has 81.56 % from 370 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, bartender, music