Joke #10021

Where does a cow stop to drink? The milky way.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal

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If it looks like chicken tastes like chicken and smells like chicken and Chuck Norris says it's beef then it's beef.
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has 47.19 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
A man enters a little country store and sees a sign reading, ‘Danger! Beware of Dog’. He then sees an old hound dog lying asleep on the floor. ‘Is that the dog folks are supposed to beware of?’ says the man to the shopkeeper. ‘Yep,’ replies the shopkeeper. ‘Before I posted that sign, everyone kept tripping over him.’
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has 63.17 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
Why are rabbits like calculators? They both multiply a lot.
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has 66.10 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal, math
What happens when you mix a frog with a bathtub scrubby-mit? A rubbit!
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has 26.98 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
Look over there! Said the frightened skunk to his pal. "There's a human with a gun, and he's getting closer and closer! What are we going to do?" To which the second skink calmly replied, "Let us spray ."
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal
Why do cows wear bells around their necks? Because their horns don't work.
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has 57.16 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal
Three handsome male dogs are walking down the street when they see a beautiful, enticing, female Poodle. The three male dogs fall all over themselves in an effort to be the one to reach her first, but end up arriving in front of her at the same time. The males are speechless before her beauty, slobbering on themselves and hoping for just a glance from her in return. Aware of her charms and her obvious effect on the three suitors, she decides to be kind and tells them “The first one who can use the words “liver” and “cheese” together in an imaginative, intelligent sentence can go out with me.” The sturdy, muscular black Lab speaks up quickly and says “I love liver and cheese.” “Oh, how childish,” said the Poodle. “That shows no imagination or intelligence whatsoever.” She turned to the tall, shiny Golden Retriever and said “How well can you do?” “Ummmm...I HATE liver and cheese,” blurts the Golden Retriever. “My, my,” said the Poodle. “I guess it’s hopeless. That’s just as dumb as the Lab’s sentence.” She then turns to the last of the three dogs and says, “How about you, little guy?” The last of the three, tiny in stature but big in fame and finesse, is the Taco Bell chihuahua. He gives her a smile, a sly wink, turns to the Golden Retriever and the Lab and says... “Liver alone. Cheese mine."
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has 80.57 % from 294 votes. More jokes about: animal
A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan. He asks, "What was that for?" She says, "I found a piece of paper in your pocket with Betty Sue written on it." He says, "Jeez, honey, remember last week when I went to the track? Betty Sue was the name of the horse I went there to bet on." She shrugs and walks away. Three days later he is reading his paper when she walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head again with the frying pan. He asks, "What was that for?" She answers, "Your horse called."
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has 64.09 % from 614 votes. More jokes about: animal, marriage, wife
A man is walking home when he sees a dog buying meat for his owner. The man watches the dog when the butcher takes a little to much and growls and him until he gets the right amount. The man follows the dog and watches as the dog stands on two legs and helps an old lady across the street. Amazed the man follows the dog home and watches the dog ring the doorbell. When the owner comes to the door the owner takes the bags and tells the dog to stay in the front yard. Frustrated the man goes up to the owner and yells "This dog is amazing! He gets your groceries, makes sure you have the exact change, helps old ladies across the street and this is how you treat him!" The owner replies, "I know but,this is the 3rd time this week he left his keys".
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why don't black kids play in sand boxs? A: Because they are affraid the cats will try to cover them up.
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has 42.21 % from 187 votes. More jokes about: animal, racist