Q: Why was the Easter Bunny so upset? A: He was having a bad hare day!
Q: Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs? A: He doesn't want anyone to know he's f**king chickens.
What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long? A runny bunny.
Why couldn't the rabbit fly home for Easter? He didn't have the hare fare.
Q: How do you know the Easter Bunny is really smart? A: Because he's an egghead.
What do you call a rabbit who works in a bakery? A yeaster bunny.
Q: What do you call a cow that's had an abortion? A: De-calf-i-nated.
Q: How is the Easter Bunny like Michael Jordan? ´ A: They're both famous for stuffing baskets!
Q: What day does an Easter egg hate the most? A: Fry-days.
While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, "No honey for you for one month!" Later that afternoon, Johnny's dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. "That's it! No butter for you for one month!" says his dad. Later that evening as Johnny's mother cooks dinner, a cockroach run across the kitchen floor. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her. Little Johnny looks at his father and says, "Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?"
I was walking home last night when I noticed an old drunk staggering along the road. He passed a woman who was walking a young child. "Lady", said the drunk, "that's the ugliest kid I've ever seen. Damn, that is one ugly child!." As the drunk wandered off, the lady burst into tears. Just then, a mailman came to her rescue. "What's the matter, madam?" he asked. "I've just been horribly insulted" she sobbed. "There there," said the mailman, reaching into his pocket. "Dry your eyes with this tissue, and here's a banana for the chimp"