Q: Why was the Easter Bunny so upset?
A: He was having a bad hare day!
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Q: Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs?
A: He doesn't want anyone to know he's f**king chickens.
Why couldn't the rabbit fly home for Easter?
He didn't have the hare fare.
What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long?
A runny bunny.
Q: How do you know the Easter Bunny is really smart?
A: Because he's an egghead.
What do you call a rabbit who works in a bakery?
A yeaster bunny.
A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands.
He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside.
The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!"
My friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor."
Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?"
He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service."
When Chuck Norris went to Easter island, he couldn't understand why other tourists kept asking him to pose for photos next to the stone monoliths.
Vote:
What's a moo hoo for a tug-of-war between two longhorns?
A bull pull.
A duck walks into a pet store and asked the owner if he sold “duck-food” here.
The owner said; “no, I don’t sell duck food here”.
The next day the duck went back to the same pet store, and asked the owner again if he sold “duck-food” here.
The owner became very angry and said; “if you ask me for “duck-food” one more time, I am going to nail your web feet to the floor!”
The duck came back on the third day and asked the owner of the pet store; “do you sell any hammer and nails here?”
The owner answered; “no, I don’t sell any hammer and nails here”.
The duck then asked; “do you sell any “duck-food” here”?
Little Johnny's father asks him if he knows about the birds and the bees.
"I don't want to know!" Little Johnny says, bursting into tears.
Confused, his father asks what's wrong.
"Oh, Dad," Little Johnny sobs, "first, there was no Santa Claus, then no Easter Bunny, and finally, no Tooth Fairy. If you're about to tell me that grownups don't really have sex, I've got nothing left to believe in."