What do you call a mobile homes for rabbits? Wheelburrows.
What is the best advice to give a worm? Sleep late.
What did the customer say to the pet shop assistant after buying a bunny? Rabbit up nicely, it's a gift.
Why is it that if you give a child an encyclopedia, lawyer is always the third thing they look up? Because the first thing a child looks up is dog. The second is snake. And under snake, the encyclopedia says See Lawyer.
A dog goes into a job centre and asks for employment. ‘Wow, a talking dog,’ says the clerk. ‘With your talent I’m sure we can find you a job at the circus.’ ‘The circus?’ says the dog. ‘What does a circus want with a plumber?’
When is the best time to fake an orgasm? When a rottweiler is humping your leg.
What do frogs do with paper? Rip-it!
How do you weigh a whale? On Whale Weigh Scales.
What did the baby dolphin do when he didn't get his way? He whale-d.
Sharks are not living on the sea because they can't breath on continent. They live on a sea, because Chuck Norris doesn't.
A gorilla was walking through the jungle when he came across a deer eating grass in a clearing. The gorilla roared, "Who is the king of the jungle?" and the deer replied, "Oh, you are, Master." The gorilla walked off pleased. Soon he came across a zebra drinking at a water hole. The gorilla roared, "Who is the king of the jungle?" The zebra replied, "Oh, you are, Master." The gorilla walked off pleased. Then he came across an elephant. "Who is the king of the jungle?" he roared. With that, the elephant threw the gorilla across a tree and jumped on him. The gorilla scraped himself up off the ground and said, "Okay, okay, there’s no need to get mad just because you don’t know the answer."