Chuck Norris won the World Horseshoe Pitching Contest while they were still attached to a Clydesdale.
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Chuck Norris doesn't think he's better than everyone, everyone thinks Chuck Norris is better than them.
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Chuck Norris saved 100% on his car insurance by switching to Geico.
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When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.
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Chuck Norris has proven Newton's third law of physics, there is no force equal to a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
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Chuck Norris broke the law once.
It still isn’t fixed.
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Where was your mom last night?
At Chuck Norris' place.
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There was no Big Bang.
Chuck Norris arm wrestled himself and the energy produced created the universe.
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Chuck actually died four years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
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Paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, but Chuck Norris beats all 3 at the same time.
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A group of children once said, "Red rover, red rover, send Chuck Norris over."
Those children were the dinosaurs.
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