Chuck Norris doesn't think he's better than everyone, everyone thinks Chuck Norris is better than them.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need oxygen tanks when scuba diving.
He simply sucks all the life out of the ocean to breath.
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Chuck Norris once hit 3 touchdowns during a friendly game of full-contact bowling.
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When Chuck Norris works out, he doesn't sweat.
His body cries.
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In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
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Chuck Norris' favorite game is winning.
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Chuck Norris can convert kilograms into centimeters.
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Bears only poop in the woods when Chuck Norris says its ok..
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Most tough men eat nails for breakfast.
Chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
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When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive.
The zombies do.
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Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies dead.
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