Chuck Norris broke the law once.
It still isn’t fixed.
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If Chuck Norris jumped off the Empire State Building, your mom would tell you to do it too.
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Chuck Norris can won the winter Olympics...
In the summer.
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Chuck Norris once ate four 30lb bowling balls without chewing.
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The best part of waking up is not the Folgers in your cup, it's knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.
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Chuck Norris doesn't go to therapy, therapy goes to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris made Journey stop beleiving.
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If Chuck Norris is defusing a bomb and has a choice of red wire, yellow wire and green wire, he chooses blue.
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If Chuck Norris had to he could give CPR to himself.
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One man said he got his butt whooped by Chuck Norris twice but he lied, because everyone knows you couldn't survive it once.
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Chuck Norris can play the saxophone... while holding his breath.
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