What do you call an unusual rabbit? A rare hare.
Q. What did the snail say when he hitched a ride on the turtle? A. Wheeeee.
A mother was teaching his child about the side-effects of alcohol. She gets two short glasses, filling one with water and the other with whiskey. She says "I want you to see this." She puts a worm in the water, and it swims around. She puts a worm in the whiskey, and the worm dies immediately. She then says, feeling that she has made her point clear, "what do you have to say about this experiment?" The child responds by saying: "If I drink whiskey, I won't get worms!"
What do you call a group of cattle sent into orbit? The first herd shot round the world.
If it looks like chicken tastes like chicken and smells like chicken and Chuck Norris says it's beef then it's beef.
What is the slowest racehorse in the world? A clotheshorse.
Have you read the book, "100-mile Horse Trek" Who wrote it? Major Bumsore.
A dog with three legs walks into a Wild West bar and says, ‘I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.’
How to you know that cows will be in heaven? It's a place of udder delight.
Two neighbors had been fighting each other for nigh on four decades. Bob buys a Great Dane and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill's yard. For one whole year Bill ignores the dog. So Bob then buys a cow and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill's yard. After about a year and a half of Bob's cow crapping in Bill's yard; being ignored all the while, a semi pulls up in front of Bill's house. Bob runs over and demands to know what's in the 18-wheeler. 'My new pet elephant,' Bill replies solemly.