How do you hire a horse?
Put a brick under each hoof!
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Why was the lion-tamer fined?
He parked on a yellow lion.
What do you call rubber bumpers on yachts?
Shark absorbers.
What happens when the cows refuse to be milked?
Udder chaos.
Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water?
A: It'll take a while before I get hard again, I just got laid by a chick.
Q: What do you get when 100 rabbits stand in a row and 99 take a step back?
A: A receding hare line.
Q: Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
A: Because then the children have to play inside.
What is a dolphin's favorite TV show?
Whale of fortune.
What do you call a rabbit who works in a bakery?
A yeaster bunny.
Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?"
"None," replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away."
"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher, "but I like the way you're thinking."
Little Johnny says, "I have a question for you. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married?"
"Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone."
"No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking."
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