Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.
Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
When Chuck Norris says 'Candyman' five times in a row, no one appears. Candyman ain't stupid.
Chuck Norris does not need a remote for his tv for all he needs to do is just stare until it turns on.
Chuck gives the sun the chills.
A body in motion will remain in motion until roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris.
There was no world recession, just Chuck Norris desiring a discount.
Chuck Norris knows the last number of infinity.
Chuck Norris looks at IEDs and the trigger man blows up.
Chuck Norris does not need deodorant because sweat instantly runs away.
Chuck Norris needs no further explanation.