Chuck Norris discovered America.
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Only Chuck Norris can cross the "Beyond" section of Bed, Bath and Beyond store.
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Chuck Norris invented the question mark... so he could say the sentence "Do you want to die slowly of fast?"
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Law of Gravity doesn't apply to Chuck Norris, he enforces it... with a round house kick.
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Chuck Norris gives poison ivy a rash.
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Racehorses have to pee like Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris checks under his bed for Fedor Emelianenko because he takes Fedor to the vet regularly.
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Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack.
His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
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Chuck Norris can eat soup with a fork.
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Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest.
Chuck Norris won by 5.
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Chuck Norris goes to the Bermuda Triangle for vacation.
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