Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.
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Chuck Norris once drank a Red Bull and the can grew wings.
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Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies dead.
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If Chuck Norris were a substance, he would abuse you.
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Chuck Norris once planted a box of Cheerios in his yard, the result was a donut tree.
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Jason Bourne is Chuck Norris' daughter...
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Chuck Norris once went to practice his golf swing at a driving range... his golf balls are now known as stars!
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Sharks watch Chuck Norris week.
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The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there.
In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
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Chuck Norris actually painted all of the colors of the wind.
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Chuck Norris made a Happy Meal cry.
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