Chuck Norris once was pulled over by a policeman for speeding.
Chuck gave him a warning.
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Chuck Norris puts ice cube trays in the cupboard, and he gets ice.
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A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are:
1. Heart disease
2. Chuck Norris
3. Cancer
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Chuck Norris can play the violin with a piano.
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They wanted to put Chuck Norris's face on Mount Rushmore, but the granite wasn't hard enough for his beard.
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Chuck Norris is so sharp you can cut yourself just by looking at him.
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Chuck Norris doesn't make typos.
Words simply stutter in his presence.
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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
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Chuck Norris didn't shoot the sheriff, but he roundhouse kicked the deputy.
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When Chuck Norris went to the beach, he gave the ocean a bath.
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Chuck Norris beat a laser beam in a race.
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