Chuck Norris likes his meat rare, so he eats unicorns.
Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.
July 4th is Independence day. And the day Chuck Norris was born. Coincidence? I think not.
Once Chuck Norris attempted to punch through a brick wall, but the brick wall crumbled in fear.
Chuck Norris can drink an entire gallon of milk in forty-seven seconds.
Chuck Norris can comment on Facebook posts, before you publish them.
Charlie Sheen is a drug, it will melt your face and kill you. Chuck Norris had two 8-Balls of Sheen and is now suing for false advertising.
Chuck Norris caught a bullet with the same gun he fired it from.
The Mona Lisa is smiling because Chuck Norris let her live.