To be roundhouse-kicked by Chuck Norris means getting his autograph.
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Chuck Norris leaves messages before the beep.
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Remember the Leia scene from The Last Jedi?
That wasn't the force, it was Chuck Norris resurrecting Carrie Fischer.
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Chuck Norris can get satellite cable from a Skoal can.
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Chuck Norris does not wear a condom.
Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't blow out brithday candles, they surrender their flames willingly.
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Prisons don’t keep society safe from criminals.
Prisons keep criminals safe from Chuck Norris, for now.
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Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme play tug a war with live annacondas.
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The original CBS Survivor series was filmed in Chuck's mansion.
No episode aired, as no one survived.
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If you look back far enough in your family tree, Chuck Norris appears at least three times.
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Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At night.
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