Chuck Norris can tap dance though a mine field... wearing clown shoes.
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Chuck Norris once won a drag race with a unicycle.
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Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
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Q: Why aren't the aliens making contact?
A: They are afraid of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once broke the land bike speed record with a bike with a lost chain and a missing back wheel.
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Chuck Norris isn't just a name, it's a cause of death.
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Chuck Norris CAN have it both ways.
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Chuck Norris likes his meat rare, so he eats unicorns.
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Neil Armstrong was the first person to walk on the moon, Chuck Norris was the first person to walk on the sun.
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Chuck Norris never suffers from a heart attack.
His heart is too smart to not attack him.
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A few guys tried to follow Chuck Norris during a light workout while he was vacationing in Hawaii. It's now called the Ironman Triathlon.
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