Joke #10822

Chuck Norris can tap dance though a mine field... wearing clown shoes.
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Chuck Norris does not submit to homeland security, he IS homeland security.
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Chuck Norris can empty a swimming pool with a fork... while it's raining.
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A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
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Spider-man can crawl on walls and ceilings, Chuck Norris can crawl on water.
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Chuck Norris likes his coffee half and half: half coffee grounds, half wood-grain alcohol.
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Chuck Norris can whistle in five different languages, including sign language.
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The actual definition of U.F.O is Chuck Norris's Toy Frisbee.
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Lehman Brothers owed Chuck Norris a fiver. When he asked for payback, well, you know the rest.
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Chuck Norris plays Scrabble with numbers. And wins.
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Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. Chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
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