Chuck Norris can tap dance though a mine field... wearing clown shoes.
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People say "bless you" when you sneeze because Chuck Norris might catch your soul.
It's a myth.
Chuck Norris can take your soul whenever he wants.
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When Chuck Norris jumps from a building, the concrete commits suicide.
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Chuck Norris can mess with the bull without getting the horns.
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Someone once broke into Chuck Norris' house and instead of stealing anything they gave Chuck Norris everything they owned.
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Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
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2012 is the predicted date for the end of the world.
The only rational explanation is Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.
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Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.
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The reason Chuck Norris has never been a doctor on House is because, he would find the diagnosis in one second.
It'd always be Norris Anger Disease.
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Chuck Norris once won a three-legged race... By himself.
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