I hope to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.
What is the definition of "moon"? The past tense of "moo"!
What do you get if you cross a steer and a chicken? Roost beef.
What's a moo hoo for a stuffed steer? A full bull.
Q: Why do gorillas have big noses? A: Because they have big fingers!
Camper: "Look at that bunch of cows." Farmer: "Not bunch, herd." Camper: "Heard what?" Farmer: "Of cows." Camper: "Sure I've heard of cows." Farmer: "No, I mean a cowherd." Camper: "So what? I have no secrets from cows."
What do you call a dinosaur with magic powers? Tyrannosaurus Hex.
Yo mama so ugly that when she delivered a little baby after birth the baby saw mum and screamed "It's a gorilla!".
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?" The eagle answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it. Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up...
First Kangaroo: What do you call it when giraffes moving one way get mixed up with giraffes moving another way? Second Kangaroo: A giraffic jam.
What two members of the cow family go everywhere with you? Your calves.