Joke #10487

Why is polar bear cheap to have as a pet? It lives on ice.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal

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What do cows wear when they are on vacation in Hawaii? Moo moos.
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has 36.90 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, geography, holiday
Q: What's worse than ants in your pants? A: Uncle.
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has 51.39 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, family, sex
What must a policeman have before searching a rabbits home? A search warren.
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has 42.03 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, cop
A woman took her dog to the vet. She said, "I think my dog is dead". The doctor laid the dog on the table and reached down and took a cat out of a box. The cat walked all over the dog and the dog didn't move. "Yes, your dog is dead," says the doctor. "How much do I owe you?" the lady asks. "$345," says the doctor. "$345!!?" the lady asks. "Yes. $45 for the office visit and $300 for the cat scan."
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has 69.39 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, doctor, dog, money
A Mom goes to the store shopping. She tells to the children, "Your father will return very drunk. Undress him down to the waist and put him to sleep." "Why to the waist", the children interested. "Because your father has a large snake below and it can bite you." The mother returned and her children met her at the door, "Mom! Mom! Dad came home! We undress him all and put him to sleep." "Are you undressed him the entire", mother worried? "What happened with the snake?" "Don't worry, Mom!" proudly answered the children. "The snake was strangled with dad's belt, her eggs were trampled and the nest was burnt."
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has 68.01 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: animal, drunk, life
What do you if you're trapped inside a whale? Run round and round till you're all pooped out!
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has 35.23 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting
There once was a baby elephant and a baby turtle drinking from a river deep in the jungle. For no reason, the turtle reaches over and bites the elephant's tail, really hard. Years and years later, the same elephant, now grown up, is by the same river, having a drink with his giraffe buddy, when the same turtle that bit him on the tail all those years ago wanders up to the river. The elephant rears back a leg and kicks the turtle as hard as he can, sending him flying way off into the jungle. "Why did you do that?" the giraffe asks. "When we both were babies, that turtle bit my tail for no reason," the elephant replied. "Wow! You must have a good memory!" exclaimed the giraffe. "Yep!" said the elephant. "I've got Turtle-Recall."
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, elephant, time
How did the instructor try to make horse riding enjoyable? He tried to stirrup some interest!
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
Are you a shark? Cause I've got some swimmers for you to swallow.
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has 49.00 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, flirt, sex
A man has his car full of penguins. He drives past a policeman, but the policeman stops him. He says. "Hey, you! Yeah, you! You should take those penguins to the zoo!" The man does that. The next day in the same spot, the man still has the penguins. Once again he drives past the policeman. "Hey, I thought I told you to take those penguins to the zoo!" "I did," replies the man. "We had so much fun that were going to the beach today!"
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal