Joke #10511

What do you call a show full of lions? The mane event.

Q: Why didn't Republicans save any of the black New Orleans residents from the flooding of Hurricane Katrina? A: They were busy trying to get two of each animal for their ark first and couldn't catch that damned roadrunner.

Some scientists decided to do the following experiments on a dog. For the first experiment, they cut one of the dog's legs off, then they told the dog to walk. The dog got up and walked, so they they learned that a dog could walk with just three legs. For the second experiment, they cut off a second leg from the dog, then they told the dog once more to walk. The dog was still able to walk with only two legs. For the third experiment, they cut off yet another leg from the dog and once more they told the dog to walk. However, the dog wasn't able to walk with only one leg. As a result of these three experiments, the scientists wrote in their final report that the dog had lost it's hearing after having three legs cut off.

Your mom's so dumb, she threw the dog and told the stick to fetch!

Why did the farmer feed money to his cow? He wanted rich milk.

Q: Why doesn't Tigger have any friends? A: He plays with Pooh.

Why was the lion-tamer fined? He parked on a yellow lion.

Q: What goes "oom... oom"? A: A cow walking backward!

Q: What happens when you cross a pig with a Democrat? A: Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.

Is it just me, or do alligators always look like they are in the middle of a push-up?

A group of Americans were traveling by tour bus through Holland. As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goat's milk was used. She showed the group a lively hillside where many goats were grazing. "These," she explained, "are the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produce." She then asked, "What do you do in America with your old goats?" A spry old gentleman answered, "They send us on bus tours!"