Joke #3038

A man walked into his backyard one morning and found there was a gorilla in a tree. He called a gorilla-removal service, and soon a serviceman arrived with a stick, a Chihuahua, a pair of handcuffs and a shotgun. "Now listen carefully," he told the homeowner, "I'm going to climb the tree and poke the gorilla with this stick until he falls to the ground. The trained Chihuahua will then go right for his, uh, sensitive area, and when the gorilla instinctivly crosses his hands in front to protect himself, you slap the handcuffs on" "Ok, got it." the homeowner replied. "But whats that shotgun for?" "If I fall out of the tree before the gorilla," the man said, "shoot the Chihuahua."
Vote: has 78.93 % from 223 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Chuck norris can eat chicken tonight tomorow.
Vote: has 54.59 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
Q: Why do gorillas have big noses? A: Because they have big fingers!
Vote: has 31.56 % from 11 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal
How come sharks don’t attack lawyers? From professional courtesy.
Vote: has 24.26 % from 11 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, lawyer
A psychiatrist had no patients in his office and he was bored. Suddenly , the door opened slowly and a man crept into the room on four legs. His mouth was full with pieces of colored plastic. He was holding strange objects in his hands. He was dragging cables along behind himself. The doctor was glad because of the visit and exclaimed, "And what do we have here, a little snake? Come to Uncle Doctor, my snake..." The man shook his head. "Oh, sorry, I didn't notice your legs. You're a dragon, right?" The man shook his head again angrily. "Sorry... a worm?" The visitor spitted out the plastic pieces. "Go to hell, you idiot! I'm the system administrator and I came to change your LAN cable!"
Vote: has 73.58 % from 77 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, computer, doctor, IT, programmer
What powerful reptile is found in the Sydney opera house? The Lizard of Oz.
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal
Did you hear about the Irishman who couldn't tell the difference between his two horses? His friend suggested measuring them, that didn't help though, the Irishman discovered that the brown horse was only an inch taller than the white one!
Vote: has 50.70 % from 22 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, horse
Q: Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? A: Finding half a worm."
Vote: has 63.22 % from 31 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, disgusting, food
What do you do when two snails have a fight? Leave them to slug it out.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal
A blind man with an assistance dog was getting ready to cross the street. When the dog took him across he almost got ran over by the traffic and the cars where sliding everywhere to avoid hitting him. When he got to the other side, he took out a treat to give to the dog. A spectator who saw what happened couldn't believe his eyes. He ran over to the blind man and said, "Sir, why are you rewarding that dog, he almost got you killed?" The blind man replied, "I'm trying to find his head so I can kick his ass!"
Vote: has 72.04 % from 33 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal
A city child came running into the farmhouse. “No wonder that mama pig is so big,” she yelled. “There’s a bunch of little pigs out there blowing her up!”
Vote: has 78.55 % from 38 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal