What do headmasters and bullfrogs have in common?
Both have big heads that consist mostly of mouth.
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What do you call a dumb bunny?
A hare brain.
A waitress walks up to a man to take his order.
"I'd like to get the turtle soup, please."
The waitress walks off to go get his order, but the man changes his mind and decides he wants the pea soup instead.
"Hold the turtle, make it pea!"
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Two blondes were walking through the woods when one looked down and said "Oh, look at the deer tracks."
The other blonde looks and says "Those aren't deer tracks, those are wolf tracks."
"No. Those are deer tracks."
They keep arguing, and arguing, about half hour later they were both killed by a train.
What do you call a herd of cows in a psychiatrists office?
An encownter group.
Q: How do you get ten fat cows in your basement?
A: Hold a tupperware party!
What do you call a lion wearing a cravat and a flower in its mane?
A dandy lion.
Why did the whale like the diver?
Because he had flippers.
What do you call a show full of lions?
The mane event.
Q: How do you know the Easter Bunny is really smart?
A: Because he's an egghead.