Q: Why do hippos have to have sex in water?
A: Ever try to keep two tons of pussy wet?
Similar jokes
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What's a rabbits favorite song?
"Hoppy Birthday to You."
Q: What animal rotates at least 200 times after it dies?
A: A rotisserie chicken.
What’s black and white and makes a lot of noise?
A zebra with a drum kit.
Chuck Norris likes his meat rare, so he eats unicorns.
Vote:
Why is a reindeer like a gossip?
Because they are both tail bearers.
Yo' Mama is so fat, after sex, she smokes a turkey.
An old couple is on a walk, when a pigeon flies by and relieves himself on the woman's head.
"Yech!" says the woman. "Get some toilet paper."
"What for? He must be half-a-mile away by now."
Vote:
What do you call a rabbit who is real cool?
A hip hopper.
A mans dog dies one day, and the man is very upset.
His dog did everything for him.
Washed the dishes.
Bought things from the shop.
The man was so upset, he decided to go and buy a new pet.
Once at the pet store, he asked the manager, "Do you have any pets that will do anything for me? My dog has just passed away and I want something to replace him."
The manager looks around.
"We don't have much, I'm afraid. Just this centipede here"
The man looks puzzled, but accepts the centipede anyway.
Back home, the man tests the centipede out.
"Go and bring me a beer from the fridge", he asks.
The centipede got to work straight away.
"Go and run a bath for me.“
The centipede did as asked once again.
The man, before getting in the bath, asks the centipede "Pop to the shop and buy me a newspaper please.“
The centipede does this.
An hour later, the man comes out of the bath, to find the centipede sitting at the bottom of the stairs, and hadn't yet gone to the shop.
"I thought I told you to go to the shop?"
The centipede replies "GIMMIE A CHANCE TO GET MI SHOES ON!"