Joke #10588

Why was the skunk angry? He was incensed.
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal

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Two cows were chatting over the fence between their fields. The first cow said, "I tell you, this mad-cow-disease is really pretty scary. They say it is spreading fast; I heard it hit some cows down on the Johnson Farm."  The other cow replied, "Hell, I ain't worried, it won't affect us ducks."
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has 53.03 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: animal, duck, health
What kind of tiles can't you stick on walls? Reptiles.
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has 63.00 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal
What's the difference between a reindeer and a snowball? They re both brown, except the snowball.
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What do you get if you cross a tiger with a sheep? A stripey sweater.
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
Why did the whale like the diver? Because he had flippers.
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has 46.70 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish
A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking a round with a fly swatter. "What are you doing?" she asked. "Hunting flies," He responded. "Oh, killing any?" She asked. "Yep, three males, two females," he replied. Intrigued, she asked, How can you tell? He responded, "Three were on a beer can, two were on the phone."
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has 64.72 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: animal, beer, men, phone, women
I heard my tire thumping, I thought it was flat. When I looked at my tire I discovered your cat. Sorry...
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has 27.24 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris uses live piranhas as bath toys.
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
A man walks into a shop and sees a cute little dog. He asks the shopkeeper, "Does your dog bite?" The shopkeeper says, "No, my dog does not bite." The man tries to pet the dog and the dog bites him. "Ouch!" He says, "I thought you said your dog does not bite!" The shopkeeper replies, "That is not my dog!"
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has 74.08 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog
A man goes to a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "You can't bring that dog in here!" The guy, without missing a beat, says "This is my seeing-eye dog." "Oh man, " the bartender says, "I'm sorry, here, the first one's on me." The man takes his drink and goes to a table near the door. Another guy walks in the bar with a Chihuahua. The first guys sees him, stops him and says "You can't bring that dog in here unless you tell him it's a seeing-eye dog." The second man graciously thanks the first man and continues to the bar. He asks for a drink. The bartender says "Hey, you can't bring that dog in here!" The second man replies "This is my seeing-eye dog." The bartender says, "No, I don't think so. They do not have Chiwauas as seeing-eye dogs." The man pauses for a half-second and replies "What?!?! They gave me a Chihuahua?!?"
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has 70.45 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, bartender