If you make a cow angry, how will she get even?
She'll cream you.
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Q: Why don't black kids play in sand boxs?
A: Because they are affraid the cats will try to cover them up.
What do you do when two snails have a fight?
Leave them to slug it out.
Yo' Mama is so poor, when she goes to the park, the pigeons throw her bread.
A blind man with a guide dog comes to a town square, takes the dog by the tail and starts whirling him around.
„What on earth are you doing?!" asks a passer-by.
The blind man replies, „Nothing, just looking around a bit."
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How far can a rabbit run into the woods?
Halfway.
After that she's running out of the woods.
I've been trying to find the right time to tell my pet hes adopted...
What is the definition of "moon"?
The past tense of "moo"!
What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space?
Steer Wars.
How do jockeys determine which racehorses are the favourites?
They take a gallop poll!
Jesse starts wailing to the vet, "you gotta save my dog, he looks real bad - please you just gotta!"
"There, there Jesse, your dog just has a broken hip he'll be fine in no time.
My fee, of course, will be $1,500."
Jesse starts to wail - "oh, my dog's going to die!!!"