Joke #10623

What's the difference between a reindeer and a snowball? They re both brown, except the snowball.
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Q: What's gray on the inside and clear on the outside? A: An elephant in a plastic bag.
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Why is it that if you give a child an encyclopedia, lawyer is always the third thing they look up? Because the first thing a child looks up is dog. The second is snake. And under snake, the encyclopedia says See Lawyer.
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A farmhand is driving around the farm, checking the fences. After a few minutes he radios his boss and says, "Boss, I’ve got a problem. I hit a pig on the road and he’s stuck in the bull-bars of my truck. He’s still wriggling. What should I do?" "In the back of your truck there’s a shotgun. Shoot the pig in the head and when it stops wriggling you can pull it out and throw it in a bush." The farm worker says okay and signs off. About 10 minutes later he radios back. "Boss I did what you said, I shot the pig and dragged it out and threw it in a bush." "So what’s the problem now?" his Boss snapped. "The blue light on his motorcycle is still flashing!"
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Why are dolphins cleverer than humans? Within 3 hours they can train a man to stand at the side of a pool and feed them fish.
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A zebra has wondered his whole life whether he was a white zebra with black stripes or a black zebra with white stripes. When he dies and goes to heaven he asks God the question "Am I a white zebra with black stripes or a black zebra with white stripes?" God responds, "You are what you are" The zebra goes to his friends and tells them what God had said and that he still doesn't know the answer to his question. One of his friends says, "Well, that means you are a white zebra with black stripes" The zebra asks him why and the friend says, "Because otherwise God would have said 'You is what you is'"
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Q: What do you call a naked deer? A: Buck naked!
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What did the naughty rabbit leave for Easter? Deviled eggs.
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Did you hear the joke about the skunk? Never mind, it stinks.
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Why does a chicken coop have 2 doors? Because, if it had 4 doors it would be chicken sedan.
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How did cows feel when the branding iron was invented? They were very impressed.
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