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Q: What do you get when 100 rabbits stand in a row and 99 take a step back?
A: A receding hare line.
Why was the skunk angry?
He was incensed.
Law of Pill Rejection
Any pill given to a cat has the potential energy to reach escape velocity.
What is the slowest racehorse in the world?
A clotheshorse.
Chuck Norris is the reason why This Little Piggy cried wee wee wee all the way home.
Vote:
No chicken dies a virgin.
They get laid at birth *slaps knee*.
Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?"
"None," replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away."
"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher, "but I like the way you're thinking."
Little Johnny says, "I have a question for you. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married?"
"Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone."
"No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking."
Vote:
Where do rabbits settle their legal disputes?
In a pellet court!
Koala: What do you mean, I'm not a bear? I have all the koalafications.
Elephant: Your koalafications are completely irrelephant.
Lion: Don't listen to him! He's lion!
Bear: This arguing is becoming unbearable!
A young lawyer was working on a farmer’s case, which asked compensation from the train company because one of they’re trains killed 24 pigs of his.
At the High Court, wanting to make impression of the damage amount, the lawyer says:
There were 24 pigs gentlemen!
Twice as much than you!