A guy was walking along the street when he saw a crowd of people running towards him.
He stopped one of the runners and asked, "What’s happening?"
The runner replied breathlessly, "A lion has escaped from the zoo."
"Oh my, which way is it heading?"
"Well you don’t think we are chasing it, do you?"
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Q:What did the polar bear say when they saw tourists in sleeping bags?
A:Mmmm, sandwiches!
What's a moo hoo for a stuffed steer?
A full bull.
A woman went to the doctor's and complained of being really sore.
"Do you have any idea why?"
"Well, I had sex with an elephant!"
"You did?
But elephants are known to have small penises!"
"Yeah, but he fingered me first."
How many tickles does it take to make a squid laugh?
Ten-tickles.
Yo' Mama is so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a whole species will become extinct.
Two deer walk out of a gay bar, one turns to the other and says, "I can't believe I blew twenty bucks in there..."
Chuck Norris can mess with the bull without getting the horns.
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The mouse and the elephant pas together over a bridge, very proud the mouse says:
Do you hear how the bridge vibrates under OUR footsteps?
Why do you never see zebras or antelopes at Victoria Station?
Because it's a mane-lion station.