A guy was walking along the street when he saw a crowd of people running towards him. He stopped one of the runners and asked, "What’s happening?" The runner replied breathlessly, "A lion has escaped from the zoo." "Oh my, which way is it heading?" "Well you don’t think we are chasing it, do you?"
Why do police dogs lick their balls? To get the taste of Nigger out their mouths.
Little Johnny's teacher said, "Johnny, your essay on My Dog is exactly the same as your sister's." Did you copy hers?, she asked. Johnny replied, "No, teacher, it's the same dog!"
Cats are allergic to Chuck Norris.
Imagine being completely naked in room full of people who speak a different language and everyone wants to touch you... This is life of a dog.
What gives milk and has a horn? A milk tank.
What is the definition of "moon"? The past tense of "moo"!
No chicken dies a virgin. They get laid at birth *slaps knee*.
What’s black and white and makes a lot of noise? A zebra with a drum kit.
What do you call the reindeer with one eye higher than the other? Isaiah.
What do you call a poodle with no legs? A sponge.