Joke #6350

Q:Where do you find giant snails? A:On the ends of their fingers.
Vote: has 50.70 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A man takes his hamster to the vet, and after a short look at the creature the vet pronounces it dead. Not happy with the vet's diagnosis the man asks for a second opinion. The vet gives a whistle and in strolls a Labrador dog. The dog nudges the hamster around with its nose and sniffs it a couple of times before shaking his head. "There" says the vet," Your hamster is dead". Still not happy the man asks for a third opinion. The vet opens the back door and in bounds a cat. The cat jumps onto the table and looks the hamster up and down for a few minutes before looking up and shaking it's head. "It's definitely dead sir", says the vet. Convinced, the man enquires how much he owes. "That will be L1000, please". "A L1000 just to tell me my hamster is dead" fumes the man. "Well", says the vet, "There's my diagnosis, the lab report and the cat scan".
Vote: has 68.45 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, death, doctor
Chuck Norris once rode a bull threw a China shop, the only thing that broke was the bull.
Vote: has 63.00 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
A crocodile has 2 eyes and 80 teeth. Question: What has 80 eyes and 2 teeth? Answer: A full bus of old men.
Vote: has 32.63 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, animal, old people
Did you hear about the man who ate nothing but oats every day? He fell in love with the Grand National winner!
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food, love
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side…
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, travel
Why did the farmer fence in the bull? The farmer had too much of a steak in him to let him go!
Vote: has 68.45 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Mohan (to the doctor): "Doctor, can you diagnose my Illness?" Doctor: "Your eyesight seems to be poor." Mohan: "How did you come to that conclusion?" Doctor: "You seemed to have missed noticing the sign, hung outside. This is a veterinary hospital."
Vote: has 83.02 % from 72 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, doctor, health, hospital, life
When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.
Vote: has 71.76 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
Did you hear about the argumentative skunk? He always liked to make a stink.
Vote: has 45.58 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
After a day fishing in the ocean a fisherman is walking from the pier carrying two lobsters in a bucket. He is approached by the Game Warden who asks him for his fishing license. The fisherman says to the warden, "I did not catch these lobsters, they are my pets. Everyday I come done to the water and whistle and these lobster jump out and I take them for a walk only to return them at the end of the day." The warden, not believing him, reminds him that it is illegal to fish without a license. The fisherman turns to the warden and says, "If you don't believe me then watch," as he throws the lobsters back into the water. The warden says, "Now whistle to your lobsters and show me that they will come out of the water." The fisherman turns to the warden and says, "What lobsters?"
Vote: has 70.72 % from 77 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, cop, dirty, fish