Joke #10789

Q. What did the snail say when he hitched a ride on the turtle? A. Wheeeee.
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Two old men, Abe and Sol, sit on a park bench feeding pigeons and talking about baseball. Abe turns to Sol and asks, "Do you think there's baseball in Heaven?" Sol thinks about it for a minute and replies, "I dunno. But let's make a deal -- if I die first, I'll come back and tell you if there's baseball in Heaven, and if you die first, you do the same." They shake on it and sadly, a few months later, poor Abe passes on. Soon afterward, Sol sits in the park feeding the pigeons by himself and hears a voice whisper, "Sol... Sol... ." Sol responds, "Abe! Is that you?" "Yes it is, Sol," whispers Abe's ghost. Sol, still amazed, asks, "So, is there baseball in Heaven?" "Well," says Abe, "I've got good news and bad news." "Gimme the good news first," says Sol. Abe says, "Well, there is baseball in Heaven." Sol says, "That's great! What news could be bad enough to ruin that?" Abe sighs and whispers, "You're pitching on Friday."
Vote: has 84.66 % from 389 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, black humor, heaven, sport
What do you call a cow that doesn't give milk? A milk dud.
Vote: has 45.58 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food
Q: What's meaner than a pit bull with herpes? A: The guy who gave it to him.
Vote: has 54.16 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, disgusting, health
How do you know when you re eating rabbit stew? When it has hares in it.
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food
Q: What is red and black? A: A sunburnt zebra.
Vote: has 51.34 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Two hunters from Moscow charter a small plane to fly them to Siberia to go bear hunting. On landing, the pilot says, "Remember, this plane can only fly with two hunters, one pilot, and ONE bear." The hunters go out and return with two bears. So the pilot says, "I told you ONE bear!" But the hunters point out that the previous year, on payment of an extra 100 rubles, the pilot had let them put two bears on board. After long discussion centering on the impossibility of the thing and the disgraceful degree of inflation, the pilot takes 200 rubles and with much pushing and shoving the hunters get aboard with the two bears. After struggling into the air and fitfully flying for about two hours, the plane gives up and plummets to the earth in a snowbank. Climbing out from under the snow and the bears, the hunters ask the pilot where he thinks they are. The pilot says, "About the same place where we crashed last year."
Vote: has 83.83 % from 129 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: airplane, animal, hunting, life, travel
What is a chameleon's motto? A change is as good as a rest.
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
What's a moo hoo for a darling bull? A dear steer.
Vote: has 45.58 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
What's a teddy bears favourite pasta? Tagliateddy.
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Q: Whats the Diffenence between kinky and perverted? A1: Kinky is when you tickle your girl friends ass with a feather. A2: Perverted is when you use the whole chicken...
Vote: has 66.88 % from 46 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, dirty, disgusting