Joke #10809

As horses say to one another. Any friend of yours is a palomino!

Q: Why did the fat turkey cross the road? A: To get hit by my car.

Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris. After 5 days of extreme pain... the snake died.

What's black and white and rolls down the Boardwalk? A nigger and a seagull fighting over a French Fry.

At the pet shop, a man spots a parrot without any feet. The man leans in, "Hey buddy, how do you hang onto your perch without any feet?" "I wrap my little parrot penis around this wooden bar, kind of like a hook." "Wow," says the guy. "I can't believe you're so smart! I'm taking you home." Weeks go by, and the parrot not only understands everything the man says, but he gives good advice. The guy is delighted. One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot says, "Hey, I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife and the mailman." "What happened?" asks the guy. "Well," the parrot says, "when the mailman came to the door today, your wife greeted him in a sheer nightgown and kissed him on the mouth." "What happened then?" asks the guy. "Then, the mailman came into the house and lifted up your wife's nightgown," reports the parrot. "Oh no!" the guy says. "Then what?" "I don't know," says the parrot. "I got a hard-on and fell off my perch."

How do jockeys determine which racehorses are the favourites? They take a gallop poll!

Q: What do you get when you cross an alligator with a road runner? A: A 100 mph nigger eater.

What country do cows love to visit? Moo Zealand.

What did one skunk say to another? And so do you.

Q: What's worse than ants in your pants? A: Uncle.

Teacher: Kids,what does the chicken give you? Kids: Meat! Teacher: Very good! Now what does the pig give you? Kids: Bacon! Teacher: Great! And what does the fat cow give you? Kid: Homework!