Joke #10820

Did you hear about the horse with the negative altitude? He always said "Neigh"

What is a chameleon's motto? A change is as good as a rest.

Did you hear about the boy who was told to do 100 lines? He drew 100 cats on the paper. He thought the teacher had said lions.

What happened to the lost cattle? Nobody's herd.

Chuck Norris could stab you with a worm.

Teacher: Kids,what does the chicken give you? Kids: Meat! Teacher: Very good! Now what does the pig give you? Kids: Bacon! Teacher: Great! And what does the fat cow give you? Kid: Homework!

Turtle to turtle: "Don't ya just love the sound of rain on your roof?"

Johnny, George, and Bert were driving along in their pickup when they saw a sheep caught in the fence with its hind end up in the air. Bert said, "I wish that was Sharon Stone." George echoed, "I wish it was Demi Moore." Little Johnny sighed, "I wish it was dark..."

Patty was sitting in her back yard digging a hole to bury her dead goldfish. Mrs. Johnson, who lived next door, was watching her over the fence. Mrs. Johnson said, "Patty, what are you doing?" Patty said, "I'm digging a hole to bury my dead goldfish." Mrs. Johnson said, "Patty, don't you think that hole is a little BIG for a goldfish?" Patty said, "No...it's inside your damn cat!"

When does a rabbit go exactly as fast as a train? When it's on the train.

Which rabbits were famous bank robbers? Bunny and Clyde.