Did you hear about the horse with the negative altitude?
He always said "Neigh"
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Why does the chicken is sad?
Because his dad is a cock.
Why does the chicken is even more sad?
Because he faces the same future.
A man enters a pet shop. He wants to buy live mice to feed his python. The man saw the cage with a parrot and begins to examine it. In this moment the parrot said,
"Your fly is undone."
The man blushed. He looked around if anyone sees him and closed his zipper. The parrot said again,
"Your pants have a slit back."
The man blushed still more and tried to cover his ass with a hand.
"Your shoelaces are untied", the parrot does not cease.
The man bent down to tie his shoelaces.
"Farted! ... You little fart", the parrot yelled.
The man died of shame and fled from the store. At this point the mice called from their cage and said,
"Coco, thanks you! You saved our lives again. You know, we'll make it up to you."
One day a man and a giraffe go to a pub they have a couple of drinks then on their way out the giraffe falls over and blocks the door the bar.
Man says "you can leave that lion here."
The man said "it's not a lion its a giraffe you idiot."
What happened to the cannibal lion?
He had to swallow his pride!
Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris.
After 5 days of extreme pain... the snake died.
Vote:
How do you make a rabbit fast?
Don't feed it.
Yo' Mama is so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a whole species will become extinct.
What does a cow like to do by a campfire?
Roast Moosmallows.
What's a moo hoo for a stuffed steer?
A full bull.